Monday, November 2, 2009

Another Week Goes By

Maintenance is fully under way our home. M has been very consistent about keeping our schedule. Last night he let me off and I didn't have to ask to hard. It was a nice kind of "gift" since he knew I was having a relaxing evening watching tv and I worked hard to entertain the kids all day. Tomorrow night will be our next maintenance and I expect it to be a bit intense since we took a night off.

Last week I had a maintenance spanking followed up by a reminder spanking almost immediately. I had completed my maintenance and corner time and follow up spanks and was in the closet for some reason looking for something. I said something with an attitude and was back over the side of the bed before I knew what hit me (literally). It was over my pajama pants but it still stung like crazy since I was already sore. I wish he would use that type of response more often, sometimes I feel like it's all maintenance these days.

The topic of November for us will be keeping a budget. I'm terrible at this and M is going to curb me but keeping track of every penny I spend. While its awful to not be able to buy as I please I know that I spend without any disregard to our checking account and the consequences that come with it. I know that this will be a painful way to get us to a better place, both painful for me because I won't have access to the account and painful because I'm sure I'll have to ask for money beyond what my allowance will be which will result in consequences for my rear end.

He's also broken the last of our switches which is a blessing! Yes they are quiet which is great with the kids, but darn if they are not the most stinky painful impelement ever. I am much more of a thudy hard implement kind of girl and the switch is my most dreaded. Though last week he used the small wooden back scratcher that he bought just for spankings and it stung awful. He really hit the lower part of my cheeks where the leg creases which was almost unbearable. I don't care for the swats to high it's more a challenge in holding my breath then. The lower ones are the ones i rememer for days and the ones that remind me to stya in line. We're both still learning though and he's definitily a quick learner.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Maintenance Sunday

This is the first full week with maintenance spankings in the mix. M has decided that 3x a week is reasonable in addition to whatever others I might rack up due to bad behavior. Tuesday he woke up me extra early and spanked me OTK briefly with his hand and then a short switching. On Thursday I was sooo tired and crappy feeling but he stuck to the schedule and woke me up (I'd went to bed a little early) when he came to bed. He was very kind about it though and the spanking was short and to the point. I haven't been spanked since Thursday and today is my 3rd (and last) maintenance for the week. He has been letting me know that all of the little things I've been doing will be addressed when he gets home from work. We have been moving so there are a lot of tensions as we decide where to put things and what we really need to buy now and what can wait etc.

My attitude has been particularly snotty and I understand I haven't been the most submissive for the past two days- in fact I'm sure I've been a bit of a pain in the "ass" with my whining and inability to compromise on some of the household decisions. I don't find submission to mean I have to agree with everything he wants/likes but that if I don't agree I need to be respectful in my tone and voice while discussing my point of view. I know I've been snappy- and I'm sure this afternoon will be long and a probably painful. I'll write more after he gets home from work. Three hours left of sitting comfortably.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Types of Spanking

I did not write this but gathered it from another LDD blogger-

I have managed to come up with twelve different Domestic Discipline spanking techniques (most of them from the LDD website). The first seven are applied without the woman misbehaving and committing an offence, whilst the remaining five concentrate more on punishment.

Good Girl (GG) spankings are used to reward the woman’s good behaviour. The woman’s HOH may verbally call his woman a “good girl” whilst spanking her. Such verbal affirmation, allows the woman to surrender her femininity during the interplay of their masculine and feminine energies. Since the woman has been good and deserving of such attentions, she will experience her man’s authority whilst she is in a highly positive, loving and submissive frame of mind. By verbally telling his woman that she is a “good girl” during her spanking, the HOH is honouring his woman’s natural submission; reinforcing her obedience and allowing her feminine sweetness to flow.

Erotic Spankings are usually used as sexual foreplay. They can also be used during sex to heighten the intensity of the woman’s orgasm. Although erotic spankings are not purely part of the Domestic Discipline lifestyle (erotic spankings apply to many spanking genres) there are many LDD practitioners who also engage in the sensual aspects to spanking.

Stress Relief spankings are implemented when the woman is stressed. The woman need not have done anything wrong (so far) but may be on the edge of misbehaving by losing her temper. The spanking not only alleviates her stress, but it also prevents her from receiving a Punishment Spanking caused by argumentative behaviour or other negative moods from building up.

Introductory Discipline is usually a spanking which is administered only once or twice at the very beginning of a LDD relationship. It is the first spanking a man gives his woman. Introductory Discipline is very important since it allows the man to see how her bottom responds to the various implements and degrees of severity. It also allows the HOH to see if the woman’s bottom will easily bruise, welt, or if the skin breaks easily. The Introductory Discipline is an ideal time for the man to iron out any kinks, so that when the woman is spanked for punishment, the process should go smoothly without any unexpected hiccups. The woman will also benefit greatly from Introductory Discipline. She will be able to practice at submissively maintaining her position without clenching, twisting, blocking or kicking. (Mr Lovingdd’s Introductory Discipline article can be accessed here)

Pre-emptive Discipline is given as a preventative measure to ensure that the woman does not misbehave in a given situation. Such a method is usually reserved for occasions where the woman has a repeated history of committing the same offence. If we take the example of overspending at the mall, a loving HOH will give his woman a pre-emptive spanking before she embarks on her shopping spree. This is to help and remind her to keep within her household budget and expenditure. Pre-emptive spankings are very beneficial to the woman, since it takes the woman out of a neutral situation (she has committed no offence) into a highly positive one. Such spankings positively reinforce the message for the woman to continually behave in an appropriate way by not repeating the same negative pattern of behaviour. (Mr Lovingdd’s Pre-emptive Discipline article can be accessed here)

Submission Spankings are also known as “just because” spankings. The woman will receive a spanking for no particular reason than just because the HOH decides to spank her; or just because the HOH feels that she may benefit from receiving a good spanking. Submission Spankings, as the title depicts, will help a woman with her submission to her HOH. These spankings will leave her with no doubt that she is subject to her HOH’s authority. Submission Spankings are also sometimes referred to as reminder spankings. They are very beneficial in reinforcing the woman’s submission and reminding her of her obedience and respect to her HOH. (Mr Lovingdd’s Submission Spanking article can be accessed here)

Maintenance Discipline is the second most important disciplinary method - second only to Punishment Spanking. Maintenance Disciplinary spankings help to “maintain” a good behaviour and attitude. For Maintenance Discipline to be effective it is important for the HOH to establish a regular Maintenance Discipline session. Maintenance Discipline is highly beneficial since it is conducted when the woman has committed no punishable offence. Thereby, the woman is in a neutral frame of mind and from this neutral frame of mind the woman is elevated to a more positive and loving frame of mind and heart.

The regular use of Maintenance spankings is extremely effective at reducing the need for Punishment Spankings. If the HOH finds that he has to frequently administer Punishment Spankings, then by increasing the administration of Maintenance Discipline, the need for punishing his woman will drop considerably. Some women have Maintenance Discipline once a week, whilst others have it applied daily (or even every morning and night). Although the frequent use of Maintenance spankings will always benefit a woman’s submission and femininity, Maintenance Discipline should be regarded in a fluid sense and should not be applied in some static way. As Mr Lovingdd states, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” In other words, if a woman’s behaviour or attitude gets progressively better, then Maintenance Discipline could be applied less frequently. If her behaviour or attitude gets progressively worse then more Maintenance Discipline is required.

Reducing the use of regular Maintenance Discipline requires a dramatic improvement in both the woman’s behaviour and attitude. Even if the woman has not committed any punishable offences but has a negative attitude, then the frequent use of Maintenance Discipline will help keep her in a more feminine, gentle and submissive frame of mind. The two most important things for the HOH to remember are to firstly, try and set aside a regular time, so that the woman is routinely disciplined at the same time and day. If the HOH is lax in his routine of applying Maintenance Discipline then the woman’s behaviour will probably worsen. A woman needs to feel secure through her HOH’s consistency and determination. Without the consistency of a regular set time for her Maintenance Discipline, the woman may start to doubt her HOH’s resolve and may feel emotionally abandoned by him. The second important issue is that it is always better to spank the woman using Maintenance Discipline more than is actually necessary. This is because the woman will always benefit in her femininity and submission by ensuring her role to her HOH. If she is spanked less than is required then non-submissive problems and negative attitudes can occur. (Read Mr Lovingdd’s Maintenance Discipline article here)

Punishment Spankings are implemented for the purpose of modifying a woman’s misbehaviour. The three most common areas of misbehaviour in the LDD lifestyle are known as the 3 D’s, namely, “Disobedience” “Dishonesty” and “Disrespect.” If the woman crosses these boundaries she will usually be faced with a Punishment Spanking. Punishment Spankings are quite different to the other spankings mentioned above, since here the woman is taken from a negative situation and brought back into a neutral one. Her HOH will strive to bring her down a peg or two. Not to bring her down below his level, but down to his level. Many women that are about to be punished, or have misbehaved have so much pride that they try to elevate themselves above their HOH. It is essential to break through the woman’s emotions so that she can be brought back down to reality and be more accepting of her offence and punishment. Scolding the woman and leaving her in a humiliating position, in preparation for her spanking, are usually strong enough to break through her barriers of pride. Some women do, however, need more advanced techniques of ALDD, to break through their wilfulness and insubordination.
The main purpose of a Punishment Spanking is for the woman to reach remorse and contrition by means of a “Tearful Discipline.” This is generally achieved by both humiliation and a severe spanking which will leave her crying very hard. By crying cathartically she is completely surrendering her will to her HOH. By surrendering her will to her HOH’s authority she is firmly brought back in touch with her femininity and submission. She will feel in no doubt that she is subjected to her man’s authority where she will feel completely protected, loved and safe. The emotional intensity and profound reconnection after a Punishment Spanking results in a deeper bonding and closeness, which is unparallel to anything experienced. Even lovemaking cannot match the emotional intimacy and intensity of the couples union, as the after effects of a good Punishment Spanking. (Mr Lovingdd’s Tearful Discipline article can be read

The Short Sharp Shock Spanking differs completely from a punishment spanking. Although it is also a punitive disciplinary measure, it does not offer the same deep cathartic cleansing from the aftermath of a Punishment Spanking.

The SSS Spanking is, however, very effective at immediately nipping the problematic behaviour in the bud. The misbehaving woman is spanked instantly without any preparation or ceremony. She will immediately have her skirt pulled up and panties yanked down, as her HOH applies a swift, firm spanking to her bottom. Such a sharp reminder is often very effective with habitual misbehaviours such as swearing, or nail biting. Bad habits such as these may have gone many years unnoticed and as a result have become deeply entrenched and hard to eradicate. The SSS Spanking will condition the woman to equate her misconduct with sharp pain, so that she is reconditioned to behave in an acceptable manner.

A useful way of using the SSS Spanking technique is to combine it with a Punishment Spanking. For example, a woman may be required to record each time she is caught swearing into her journal. If she exceeds a certain amount of SSS Spankings for the same offence in a month, she may then need the more severe measure of discipline (i.e. Punishment Spanking) to drive the message home.

Transformational Discipline is also referred to as the “Avoid At All Costs” spanking, by practitioners of Christian Domestic Discipline. A Transformational Discipline spanking is something which is only reserved for very rare and extremely serious misdemeanours. Transformational Discipline is usually administered at the same severity as a Punishment Spanking (technically as severe as the woman’s bottom will withstand.) The main difference between Punishment and Transformational type spankings is that in Transformational Discipline the duration of the spanking is usually doubled. So if a woman receives a Punishment Spanking lasting ½ an hour, Transformational spanking would last a whole hour.

To ensure that the woman’s bottom can accommodate such a long and severe spanking, it is essential that her bottom is prepared with the use of a proper “warm up.” By slowly increasing the intensity of the swats the woman’s bottom will be able to withstand both the severity and length of the Transformational Discipline spanking.

A Transformational Discipline will reap immediate positive results in a woman’s attitude and behaviour. It is a spanking which leaves the woman totally “transformed.” The word “transform” means to change shape. “Trans” meaning to move (like transport) and “form” meaning shape – a mathematical term meaning moving from one shape to another.

Transformational Disciplinary spankings do not simply modify her current misbehaviour, but it completely eradicates it. Hence, the woman changes shape, she transforms, she completely moves from a negative behaviour and attitude into a positive one. (Mr Lovingdd’s Transformational Discipline article can be read here).

Multiple Discipline is applied via a series of Punishment Spankings two or more times in the same day. Sometimes a woman just doesn’t learn her lesson and continues to repeat her negative attitude and behaviour. When this happens the woman will need a second or even third Punishment Spanking to help her understand the error of her ways. Multiple Discipline will help the woman learn her lesson in no uncertain terms. The actual implementation of Multiple Discipline is very painful to the woman, who has to endure spankings on her bottom which is already very sore from her previous spanking.

Mr Lovingdd likens a woman’s misbehaviour to the layers of an onion. He claims that each spanking removes a layer. Sometimes, however, there are several “onion layers” which need removing. Each time a woman is spanked her behaviour improves – thus, a layer is peeled away. Sometimes, improvements may not necessarily be related to the behaviour which got her into trouble in the first place (i.e. the woman is continually misbehaving and in need of Multiple Discipline) it is important to realise, that the first spanking wasn’t simply a waste of time. The first spanking would have dealt with other important (albeit indirectly related) behaviours and attitudes.

The benefits from Multiple Discipline give the woman the certainty that her continued misbehaviour will not be tolerated. Such consistency is very reassuring to the woman who will learn that her misbehaviour will always receive the same fate and not go unnoticed. (Mr Lovingdd’s Multiple Discipline article can be accessed here)

Disobedience Discipline is extra discipline incurred for disobedience; it is normally only applied during the punishment process. One of the biggest acts of disobedience and disrespect a woman can commit is when she violates her own punishment. The disciplinary process is there for her own good so that she can learn and grow from her mistakes. Yelling, kicking, clenching, swearing, blocking, twisting or pushing up out of position, are all very detrimental to the disciplinary process and should be punished by a firm Disobedience Discipline.

Many comments arise, from people saying that it is not humanly possible for a woman to remain in such an obedient state during discipline. That the sheer pain will make her go into “reflex” mode where she will automatically start to twist, clench, block etc… Whilst it maybe true that submission during discipline can be extremely difficult at the start of the LDD lifestyle, one of the main purposes of Maintenance Discipline is to regularly teach the woman how to submit during her spankings. Once the woman becomes truly submissive in both mind and heart, she will totally submit her weaker surrendering energies over to her man’s stronger and authoritative ones.

She will understand that resistance to her HOH’s methods of correction are the biggest acts of disobedience that she can commit. She will also understand that resistance displays an incredible amount of disrespect to her man; it actually challenges his role as HOH and makes a whole mockery of the disciplinary process. Women should try to avoid Disobedience Discipline by taking the time to reflect and prepare themselves in their submission before their spanking. If they get Corner Time prior to discipline, they should use this time effectively to prepare themselves emotionally and not prevent their HOH from his duty, in implementing his loving but firm correction. (Mr Lovingdd’s Disobedience article can be accessed here.)

Our New LDD Adventure

M and I are new at LDD and working to fully embrace it into our relationship and our lives. It has been a looooong first 7 days for my bottom however as he tweaks and refines his technique. The LDD concept is something that I've read about and wanted for a long time and finally have reached a place where it seemed safe and appropriate to bring it up. He has amazed me with his willingness to learn and is embracing it almost more than me I think. There's so much more to it that the spanking however and it is the bigger picture that lures me in.

Working in an environment where I have to be in charge all the time is stressful and I look for home to be a place where I can focus on creating harmony and a happy family. His taking charge of so many aspects of our lives, including my behavior, make me respect him as the man he is and make me want to submit my body and my heart to him. I want to please him and I know in order for this to work for us that submission is something that I will be brought to and through that he will know happiness in my willingness to please him and I will know happiness in his willingness to care for me.

I'm just so excited we are here, at the beginning of all this, despite the fact my bottom really does sting from the switching I got this morning (a reminder to not repeat a mistake from yesterday) and knowing that I am still in "trouble" over the matter- nothing could deter me from this path and our future.